'Yunki main jyaada baat toh nahi karti' types

Now these ones are the reincarnation of our popular Basanti from Sholay. These local train commuters talk talk all through the journey. They generally appear in groups of two or more. So if you are seated or are standing besides them, here is what all you get to know about them:

1.How irritating their mother-in-laws & sister-in-laws are
2.How irregular their bais (housemaids are)
3.How sacrificing they themselves are
4.How annoying and opportunistic their bosses are
5.How useless their colleagues are
6.How did they like the latest movie...
7.What a bloody @#$#@# their ex-boyfriends were

Well, the list is endless, so please wait for the version 2 of this post.

I would like to thank Kavita for her interesting inputs on this post.

'Main deodorants mein believe nahi karta' types

Meaning - I don't believe in wearing deodorants. These species found in local trains are the ones which cast such a spell on your senses that you inadvertently end up holding your breath / nose. They surely know how to keep people at bay and have enough space for themselves. And if you are the unlucky types, you well end up standing in a crowded train under the shelter of a human-repellent arm.


Annu's suggestion to the Non-'Main deodorants mein believe nahi karta' types:
Scream, "What is this weird smell around?"
or
Remove a deo from your bag and spray it all at the source of the odour.
or
Try holding your breath for the longest possible time. You never know one day you'll become a Guinness World Record holder for the same!
Meet funny commuters in Mumbai local trains right here!

'Maine ticket khareeda hai, main raja jaise baithunga' types

Space has become a vital part in the life of some of our 'smart' Bombay local train travellers. And I'm not talking about the space that we need in our life.

Meet 'Maine ticket khareeda hai, main raja / rani jaise baithunga / baithungi' ('I've bought the ticket, I'll sit like a king / queen') types.

They are 'trained to push the world, rush to the window seat and rest their weight on the fellow travellers. Did I mention that for this once, these people love to show off that they are fatter than they appear - they need more space to sit.

And God forbid if these kings and queens don't get a place to sit, they stand on our feet as if our feet were a carpet. These are the same class of people who never miss a chance to train even their 4-year old this royal technique.

Beware, these types are everywhere in Bombay's local trains - gents and ladies compartments alike. Did I mention that a fourth seat in the gents compartment DOES NOT EXIST? If someone happens to ask a third seat man to shift, that 'seat-beggar' is assumed to be a non-first class ticket holder.

Annu's suggestion to the Non-'Maine ticket khareeda hai, main raja jaise baithunga' types:
  1. Peaceful minds, avoid the neighbourhood of such people.
  2. In case, you are the rebel types, be prepared for high decibel level voices and insults.
  3. Embarrassing the hell out of these types can be the only solution for rebels.